Insanity Revisited

Thanks :)

2012-01-24T09:26:00.001-08:00

Thanks a bunch , Hayani!

What will I ever do without you? :D

Sorry couldn’t help it XD oh and I have deleted your password from my memory. I don’t even know what it is right now. No worries. I don’t like Blog-jacking. Its horrid ;)

Design :)

2012-01-24T09:24:00.001-08:00

Hello there fellow human(s) !

I would like to point out that this blog has been through template editing. Yes, yes it is obvious. Stop rolling your eyes.

Truthfully I have no idea what to write here.

I’m Hayani. Not Haziq/Elethor/Elliebelly. Our writing styles are different even though I have learned from him. Over the past years that I’ve known about this blog, it has helped me improve my writing skills tremendously. So it was an honour for me to help decorate this blog to make it seem more attractive and exquisite.

Oh by the way, Haziq, if you want me to change the design just because you’re bored of it. Just ask :)

Keep writing, your words sometimes becomes the voice of our hearts.

Sincerely ,

-Hayani-

The Release

2012-01-23T02:15:00.000-08:00

Long has time set still here, a bitter reminder of old habits, of long dried tears,

Of what was, what has been and what will never be again.

Time here lies waiting, it knows no end to patience,

Because time know's, you will come once more.

Imagine what thus has been, what you will never look back in your life fondly in, remember that moment. Cherish it. For what would life be if not sweet for those who have traveled through the roughest patches of life and have yet, came not unscathed but rather, has born their scars with what should only be known as Heroism. Seeing life come crashing down, but not at all surrendering, shows of a man who seems to have no fear, but do you not believe instead that he has conquered what all else deem impossible.

And though you may just laugh and call him fool for him to traverse such a obvious course that bears respite only at it's bitter conclusion. But know that he does not take heart, for he knows, what only men such as he knows, to overcome travesty, to overcome that which all claim impossible, is an accomplishment that nothing can take away.

And thus we see where time now hides, for the moment that the Hero chooses down his path and the Villain chooses to laugh and ridicule, time freezes yet a copy of itself in this very moment. And from then on this moment on, nothing but just reminders that can never be forgotten. Fond for some and crushing for others.

I began with a tale of how time sat still, but heed that what is seen may not be what is meant, and though time may see, yet unchanged in here, a picturesque moment from a forgotten time, if you look, you will see, these are in the past, and though nothing can be changed we must remember that everything must be learned from it.

If no man learned from what lies in time, Then man is doomed to repeat their sins,

Though man should forgive what passed, Never must they forget.

For though should the world split, time never will forget.

And time also knows, if you don't remember.

Then yet another has the pleasure.

Torture

2011-01-10T10:03:00.000-08:00

The mind is a terrible thing to waste, the strength untold and it's potential only the truly gifted can comprehend, and it is akin to a vault where our deepest darkest kept secrets lay hidden. The thin line of your mental fortitude is the only thing standing between unveiling the truths you strive so hard to keep silent.

This is true for more than just the common man, infact the real truth is that the secrets are dangerous and that the secrets in the truly wicked are what needs to be attended to, people who are deranged, committed to a cause that not only threatens society but loyal to a master whose vast intricate plots aim only to utterly unravel the fabric of our society and lead us into dystopia.

I bring this matter before you as I believe that the methodology of digging out this information is hardly efficient anymoe, more and more we realize that when given such an immense secret, would they not go to great lenghts in order to ensure that this information can't be privied out of them.

Society has over time, developed intricate methods of torture in order to slowly break away their resistance, everything from the humble beat down to intricate plots of methodologically tearing down their barriers, stripping them away of things dear to them, slowly but surely making their lives akin to living in hell. Alas, sometimes it bears no meaning, but what are we but proud creatures forged by our makers and we pride ourselve in torture. We are beings of sophistication therefore we strive to always make our net of being more and more intricate. We must remember that we pride ourselves on sins and never on the true values of life.

Why do we forever glorify the acts of mutilation, of combat and of destruction ? Why do we not think to savor the beautiful flower that is life, because like a flower, the time we bloom is short, why must we let it go to waste? Perhaps, the truest and yet, simplest answer that yet hides right infront of our eyes is that we are forever eliminating each other to ensure we survive. Indeed, when it was said that the weak shall inherit the earth, there will be some that agree with me that it is meant that they will inherit the earth that we march on their bodies feeding our strength.

Alas, such a morbid view this poor lad has? Perhaps, the smile is not his to use , for if everyone is to speak of sunshine, who then is to remind you that just as the sun rises every morning, it sets every evening and gives way to the dark night .

Masks

2010-12-10T11:28:00.000-08:00

The beauty of flowers in the wind, the trees up their masks of color and hide their crooked branches.

The come of fall and slowly the masks of the trees fade away. Unable to conceal their crooked nature.

Then winter arrives and covers the wicked branches with sheets of beautiful snow and beauty is theirs again.

Spring comes, the beauty fades. And the cycle begins a new. The tree know's he has no aesthetic value,

No chance to spread far and wide, and so his mask of flowers once more come.

The masks people wear. Pretend to be strong. And for some, who's masks are so thick and off to much volume, there is no longer a man within his masks.

The weak shall overcome and soread

Angels In The Night Sky

2010-11-12T10:41:00.000-08:00

I lie on the grass, staring up into the sky. Life has dealt the cards and I am left to play the game of solitude as though it may seem cruel, it is just another card played before we shuffle once more and the cards are dealt once more. I close my eyes and see flashes of my days before and wonder what has led me down this lightless road.

Never has the road not traveled been accommodating and we wonder why we choose to go down that path and in the end, we take a step back and go back on the path that most everyone takes and in the end, the joy that could have been is ripped away by our choices. The choice we did not take will haunt us more than the ones we take. Do we as people so strongly believe in the choices made before that we are willing to be shackled to the boundaries society sets and never make for freedom. Our forefathers forever strove to break the barriers and chains in order to set us free but in the end we slave ourselves. Visages of what could have been haunt us and we regret.

To travel the lightless road is dangerous and scary, but we must never forget that not all darkness is treacherous, and not all dark roads lead to despair. As the sailors of old did and went out into the darkest edges of the world, they were not struck with struck dead but instead they were struck with wonder and are forever able to carry their memories with pride. The greatest treasures hides behind the most dangerous seeming roads.

It is time to hearken and hold your beliefs close. Courage has never been more important as we may not all enjoy fame, but those who are never afraid to do what no one else has before are heroes. Failure or success, they accomplish more than ever can be for someone else who is not as foolhardy as he.

I open my eyes and the sky has darkened. I fear not, for I know that no darkness is hopeless. And as I lay there, wind blowing and the sky clear, the first vestiges of the stars begin to shine and I feel hope returning to me. Hope I had thought lost.

I am guilty of traveling the road most traveled, but I do not wish to be a slave, I have no desire to be held in chains. I wish to be free. I will run back to the start and run down the path not traveled and for that for every risk and danger I encounter, the result in the end would be more than worth it.

And the truth is, I am afraid. Because I do realize the peril. But my fear of the unknown is nothing compared to the fear of chains, and even if I am to lay broken on the road, I will not yield and I will fight on till the last breath has left my lungs and I lay dead and broken. What does not kill you makes you stronger, even till the edges of your life.

Would you take the risk?

Looking still into the now star lit sky. I see the angels of heaven come down from above, from the stars. And I realize, I have wasted too much time. Broken I lay there and as the blood ebbs away from my body and my breath grows shorter, I take the time to smile and thank them for the opportunity.

They arrive, and I know nothingness.

I am nothing, just a nick on the tree of history. To some, I might be significant, to most, I am nothing. A death not mourned for it is not known, a passing of a hero of adventure comes and goes as the wind. Noted but not significant.

Pieces of Insanity

2010-07-07T08:09:00.001-07:00

The night calls to us all, the welcoming shadow hiding our true visages from the masses, whether knowingly or unwittingly, we pride ourselves in the our innate ability to be who we are not . We are slowly falling into an indomitable abyss where we slowly throw our identities to try and be plastic copies of what we are not.

Who are we but the plastic molds of what we aim to be, forever trying to attain the unattainable thereafter dooming us to an eternity of imperfection. We spit and trample upon the blood, sweat and tears of those before us who strove hard in order to ensure we were a free people, prejudice thrown aside and that we could all hold hands and love one another by bastardizing their Utopian image with our own dystopian lives.

We claim that we fight for equality, that we fight for what is right and just but each and everyone of us must realize that we are all fighting for ourselves. We are but human, the one perfect imperfection . We are all slowly falling into line and behaving like herded cows chasing after trend after trend. We have no need to look far for I myself am but a hypocrite, the rapist preacher to a crowd of murders .

Ever do we see great people rise up and take a stand to be different, to be unique, to be who they are and not another bound and gagged slave of a system that long forgot who gave them the power, the people that promised beauty, that promised, freedom, that promised wealth but only delivered us into an era of pollution , media slavery and unattainable dreams of wealth.

Greed is insatiable, hidden behind false masks of angelic smiles the devil lurks and drives us to do what we deem most appropriate. There be rare a person who would do for others and hope for naught in return, at the very least they would do it in the name of garnering praise from the Lord . A selfless act turned selfish, a brave act turned opportunistic , a beautiful smile laced with seduction to draw us from the right road.

But fear not, for though I speak of dystopia, of slavery and of submission akin to those of medieval times, there are people out there, if I might say, akin to Neo who slowly but surely snap the blinded masses from their stupor and inspire. Far too few for Utopia but surely more than enough to hold on to that last thread, that very final hope of Utopia.

The masses, will claim ignorance, each to his own will react with the words "I am not the slave, I am not the fool, I am not the submissive whore to the bastard grasps of the system" but alas, these are the very fools that fall victim to the grips of media . Disillusioned to believe themselves unique in a world of plastics.

It's very much apparent that I myself, am plastic, but only a blasted mold that was never meant to be, cracked and uncolored, untended and uncared for , left to rot in the mass of filth that is history .

Pieces of Insanity p. 1

Musings of an inane man .

2010-03-14T06:05:00.000-07:00

What is a great person? Is a great person the person who scores straight A's in his or her studies? Is the great person someone who excels in sports? Or is he the one who is linguisticly gifted or perhaps better than most at numbers or maybe the person has a knack for organizing things. Perhaps, a combination of the three would be the best description. I for one, have my own definition for a great person.

A great person is someone, despite not being academically gifted our athletically outstading, gives it his or her all at his chosen field. A great person will commit more than his fair share of time and he will expend almost all of his energy to excel at what he does. But what stands about a person I deem great, is that despite his all his efforts, and somehow, he manages not to achieve greatness, and gets knocked down far from his pedestal, he will dust himself off and begin again. A great person is characterized by the spirit where he or she will never back down, and every challenge that is thrown in his way, he will meet head on. A great person will not delegate tasks to others nor blame his lacks on others because he is responsible enough to know that this is what he must do.

A great person also realizes a very important fact. That fact is that no matter how significant, no matter how impossible, no matter how daunting a task may be, the deciding factor is within himself. A great person knows that before he will achieve in life, he will have to face his demons. And when he faces his demons and unmasks them for what they are, he will realize the demon was none other than himself. What he will realize is that the only thing ever standing in between him and whatever he wants is himself. He will realize that though he may drop to his knees and cry foul, and perhaps it might be of some avail, it is far more rewarding to commit the effort in order to overcome those odds and he will have improved.

A great person will have great mannerism, as if he fails to achieve such basic gentlemanry standards, would he even be fit to be deemed great. His mind will be made of resolve. His will might seem absolute at times and there seems to be no changing his mind, but that is where a great person is better than an arrogant person, he will admit his wrong and take the better option when presented. He will also grab at every oppurtunity he can, no fear of failure for he knows that every failure brings him closer to success and he will not despair.

There are many sayings, there are many musings, there are many quotes, there are many songs and they are many things people have said over time that may embody the spirit of a great person, but in my humble opinion, I believe the one most suited for a great person would be,

"No Giving Up"

And to all my friends, regardless of where you are at life, everything and everyone around you seems to be such a problem, nothing seems to go right, all your effort goes to waste, all your supposed ability just a age old story. Don't live in regret, begin a new and remember those words. Never allow yourself to give up.

Call me sentimental, call me emo, call me arrogant, this is the one topic I wish to voice out, because to be honest, the writing helped me to find some sort of solace, and to help refocus myself. I will be better than today, and I will strive to be the best, and though obstacles may stand in my way. Giving up is no option.

Valentines Day, 2010. =)

2010-02-13T10:32:00.000-08:00

Zeke was a guy who was unlucky with women. It wasn't in the sense that he couldn't interact with them, it was just that somehow someway, instead of becoming someone they loved and treasured, he became a brother, a shoulder to cry on, a counselor, a tutor and much more. He enjoyed his life but he always wondered, why is it that nobody ever fell for him? Was he a fool that believed that true love was real?

Perhaps.

Zeke always seemed to be happy when around his friends, smiling and cracking jokes, being the life of the party and all, but it was more a ruse to make sure nobody worried about him. He didn't like people worrying about his well being. He wanted to be a kind of person that would always be able to do good deeds, and of course, to make up for the things he lacked in life.

One day, Zeke met someone during an otherwise mundane trip to town and he thought that he had found someone he could appreciate. He told himself not to fall in love because truthfully, he could not handle the pains of watching as they left him for another as all the ones that past had done.

Every morning, he would send a message telling her that he hoped she would enjoy the day, and every night he sent her a message hoping that she enjoyed it. He didn't know if what he was doing was right or wrong, he had no clue about the rituals of courtship. The pair talked often, over many mediums, the internet, phones, in person, letters and all other sorts of innovative and classic ways they could find.

He found himself falling in love, and he violently struggled to pull himself from that feeling. He didn't know what to do. The feeling began in a small part of him and slowly it built itself. Powerless, he relented to it and surrendered himself to his fate. He gathered what resolve he had and put in all the effort he could in order to win her over and not see himself fall again.

Their conversations got even more frequent which seemed an impossibility because they were already communicating with each other most of the day. He listened to her problems and always was there whenever she needed him. He never told her any of his problems, because he did not want to burden her, he never told anyone his problems really. Perhaps he was just afraid of expressing himself, or maybe he just didn't know how.

One day, he found himself suddenly filled with courage. He wanted to tell her how he felt. Unfortunately, that was a very busy time for the both of them so he could only express his feelings through a text message, in which he summoned as much linguistic prowess that he had. The text message went something like this.

"Dear L, you are like a bright star in my dark, depressing life. You bring forth a ray of hope and send the shadows scurrying. I can't imagine my life if I hadn't met you. All my waking hours I think of you and hope that you think of me, and all my sleeping hours I have dreams of you and nightmares that would would leave me. No word's can truly describe the way I feel for you as I have not felt this way for a person in my life. No past flame nor relationship has ever brought me this feeling. You are the only one I can trust and I believe that you are one that the big guy above has sent my way and I believe we are meant to be. Oh L, will you be mine, and allow me to hold you close, love you and care for you?"

L did not respond. Zeke was heart broken. He went to sleep that night and for once, he had a dreamless night. He woke up in the morning, and he sent his usual text. Still no reply. He despaired, so he fell deeper into despair. He went to the kitchen and made very strong coffee, and after drinking the cup. He went into his room.

This part has two endings, the happy, and the sad. I'll write the happy ending first. Sad ending will be marked.

Happy

As he was about to go back to his little online world, back to the day to day habit of cheerfully helping people. he heard a knock at the door. Wondering who in the world it was this early, he got out of his room and answered the door. He saw someone that would make all the previous suffering disappear all at once.

L stood at the door, car parked on the side of the road, holding a her phone, she stared into his eyes and finally, she smiled and said "Zeke, I love you too." and ran into his arms, Zeke could not believe that he was finally going to be with someone that loved him. And with that, Zeke and L remained happy together for as long as this story remains relevant.

Sad

He went back to his little online world and checked her facebook profile. She had posted something along the lines of disgust about what he had done last night, or so he thought. He also saw that she had uploaded some pictures of her with some guy he knew but didn't think would be able to get it on with her. In truth, the guy was her cousin but he didn't know that nor was he inclined to think so after the many heart breaks in his life.

Zeke wrote a suicide note, telling of how he all he had done in life was to please people but it had brought him nothing but heart ache and that no one would ever love him, the usual emo banter that would put Linkin Park to shame. He opened the window of his room, and jumped out head first, falling the two stories to the ground and cracking his head, killing himself instantly.

Moments later, she arrived at his house to tell him that she loved him, when no one answered, she panicked and used a spare key he always kept under his doormat which he had told her some time ago. She walked around the house and saw that it was very apparent that he had been up and about not moments ago, she could also see that there was no dirty laundry so he could not have showered and went out. Walking into what she thought was his room, she saw the note, and broke down in tears, she did not have the heart to look out the window.

She called the ambulances in tears as she crawled up into a ball in his room and cried her eyes out. When the ambulances arrived and pronounced him dead, she lost it. Now she has found someone else and gone on with life, but she will never forget what had happened.

As for Zeke? He's dead.

Hells Yeah

2010-02-03T08:51:00.000-08:00

So, the facade I keep around me to assure people I am always happy is tearing down. I seem to find myself ever going into a place where people think I'm some sort of playboy. Wowee, I don't know what to say. Girlfriends? Me? Hahaha, as enjoyable as that notion would be, I have no such thing. And as per custom of being an interwebs masterz, I'm always doomed to never have one. Everybody will tell you that I am not one of those guys who are lucky enough for relationships.

Haih, so is it some kind of fun game now to toss a random girl and say they are involved with me? Is it so fun to destroy every fathomable thing I hold dear. Is it so hard for her to believe I love her and no one else? Is it so hard? Why is it so easy to believe that I am instead a sex loving god of lust? Dude, moral integrity. We of the internet are not like the rabble you meet outside.

Which is why we always wonder, why do they always go for the fucking jerks. Damn it. If anybody fucking tells me to chill out I'll bring you to your grave.

Work in progress

2010-01-18T07:46:00.000-08:00

I haven't touched this blog in a long time. Here is a story that stems from my rather depressed state. It is based on Ezekiel Angelus, a character I roleplay as on ShadowSide and it explores his rather morbid side. Enjoy.

It seemed like any other night. Ezekiel was fast asleep in his part of the dorm and the night seemed to ooze a sense of calm and tranquility. Even Walter, Zeke's eccentric friend, was fast asleep as the night marched on. Unfortunately, fate had a different thing instore for Zeke. As Zeke slept, flashbacks of his time back at his home began in his mind. At first, there were happy memories of his youth. His days spent playing with Gabriel, growing up together with him as they took on many challenges and each rising up to be an outstanding individual.

Tragically, this rather happy line of thoughts turned extremely dire, as Zeke was forced to relive Evo's dawn once again. He remembered that morning very well. He woke up and saw that everything was in a blur, rushing to find his friend Gabriel, he found him with tears welled up in his eyes and ash in his hand. He remembered what happened, the dawn had unleashed some powers within Gabriel that he had accidentally unleashed on his father. Zeke remembered, he also remembered the wild crowd of people that came in and chased after Gabriel. He remembered how they killed him and left his body for the vultures. "Animals, all of them" Zeke thought.

Suddenly, he was thrust into memories not his own. He could see them, other Evo, being hunted down by petty humans and murdered. Not because they were in the wrong, but because of fear. The people feared them and so they oppressed. This enraged Zeke for some reason and he felt power flow into his arms and he lashed out at the target.

With that, Zeke's dream ended and he sat there, staring into the wall. He felt hate build in him as he sat there staring. There was anger for how they treated Gabriel, anger to the way they treated the Evo in general. He felt the need to bring justice to the people who had so easily turned on who were once their own brethren and killed them out of distrust. Not only that, they had even murdered other humans as well.

Runes appeared over Zeke's body as he felt as if he had just been given a divine mandate to bring those insolent baboons who had oppressed them so to justice. His justice. Standing up, he grabbed the ceremonial knife which the beast he had been defeated by left and left the dorms clad only in his simple bedtime attire, a matching pair of black tee and pants. He made a beeline straight for the redlight district of Fukuoka. Zeke stalked around stealthily to ensure his identity was secure.

Just so happens, as he was sneaking around, he saw what he wanted to see. A group of four men grabbing a young lady and throwing her into a deserted alley. He could barely make out what they looked like save that one of them was bald while the others looked like his goons, they were even decently well built. They began beating at her and seemed about ready to rape her. Zeke, suddenly filled with a bloodlust he has never felt before rushed at them, unbeknown to him that the runes which had glowed earlier now had an even more defined look to them, akin to archaic symbols which was held in great regard as being the symbols that the heavens used.

Exploding from where he was hidden, the first blow he launched lack the grace he usually moved with. He threw a right hook straight at the knee of the first man, a burly fellow who seemed a lot tougher from a far. As the blow connected, Zeke could feel and hear the kneecap shatter under the pressure. Before the man could scream however, Zeke had already followed through with a knee to the face which shattered the mans nose and left him unconscious.

The other three men shook off the surprise and turned to face Zeke. Seeing the opportunity open up, the woman ran for her life. Zeke stood there facing the three standing men and a grin formed on his lip. The bald one said "What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you know who you are dealing with?!". Zeke nodded and said, "Trash". With an obvious look of utter hatred, the bald man pulled out a knife and his two bodyguards pulled out weapons of their own. They charged Zeke as one, but unfortunately, lacked the finesse for the coordinated maneuver.

The man on the left of the boss, a man with cropped hair, came rushing in first with chain raised overhead. Zeke didn't hesitate, nor did he even know what he was doing. He shattered the mans cheek bone with a horizontal elbow with his right arm and broke his chain wielding right arm by holding it with his left and kneeing it upwards as he brought the arm lower. The man screamed in pain as he felt the pain shoot through him like the flames of hell itself. Not contended just bringing him pain, Zeke threw the man towards his boss. Taking him out for the time being.

Turning towards the last standing bodyguard, Zeke noted that he seemed more battle hardened than the first two so he prepared himself to get into a proper fight. The guard raised a machete and came charging at Zeke. Somehow feeling embarrassed about overestimating the opponent, Zeke rushed in and kneed the man in the ribs, shattering several in the process. He heard and felt the blood gushing from the mans open mouth and the feeling made Zeke much more bloodthirsty. He turned towards the boss who was only just getting back into his feet. "This is not over just yet punk" Zeke said and proceeded to knock the man out with a devastating uppercut.

The four men woke up, all around them was darkness save for a single lightbulb hanging above a chair. One tried to move and he realized that they were all tied to wooden stakes shaped like crosses. They looked as if they were crucified save for the fact their hands were not nailed on. Yet.

Zeke observed as they came to as he had accustomed himself to the low light situation before they had. He was somewhat relived that they were alive. He was unsure if they could have survived the beating he gave them. He walked up to the first one, whose' knee was now in ruins and was forced to hang on a stake. Zeke lovingly stroke good leg with the care one would normally see from a mother stroking her baby. He stroked it several times, with each stroke, the foursome grew more and more anxious, moreso the man who was now being stroked. Suddenly, Zeke pulled out a dagger and thrust it right through the mans kneecap. The man tried to scream but it was to no avail. The very room seemed to sap the sound they made. Zeke slowly used it like a saw and sawed off the man's leg from the knee down. He then brought the severed leg off into the darkness.

"Justice" muttered Ezekiel as he disappeared from sight. The man who had just had his leg ripped apart kept on trying to scream, the agony he was in surpassed the words of man. A leg missing and a kneecap shattered, as well as the nose. He was sure he was going to be the worst target of them all.

Zeke returned, looking slightly bloodier than earlier but otherwise unchanged, he stalked around the room and turned to the man who had attacked him with a chain. He walked up slowly to him and brought his face close to his own. He stared deep into his eyes, projecting hatred into him. Then, Zeke's lips made contact with his for a brief moment right before Zeke's right hand slammed it as hard as he could into the man's crotch. He repeatedly hit the man there until he saw the man pass out from pain. He then pulled out the knife once again but this time he used the blind side, and pounded the mans fingers over and over again until they resembled nothing more than mashed potatoes.

The third man and his boss had been looking in horror as it happened and they knew what was in store for them was probably worse than dying. Taking the initiative to end his own life before he was subject to any torture, the bodyguard tried to bite his tongue but was disrupted when Zeke launched a punch so devastating it shattered the mans teeth. Zeke then grabbed the mans tongue and slowly, slowly, ripped it out. The man screamed but his screaming slowly died out as the blood started blocking his throat and causing him to choke. The man tried to cough the blood out but Zeke stuffed a rag in his mouth and taped it tight.

Zeke then turned to the boss of the whole group, the least hurt and the one in for the most pain, mr baldy. Zeke walked into the darkness and pulled out the Ceremonial dagger before stalking back to the boss. "I despise people like you" Zeke said as he approached. The boss was white with terror as he realized that death wouldn't come quick for him. The first thing Zeke did was gently place the dagger on his left wrist and slowly sawed at it. He made sure that every little action was felt. He grew extremely excited when he saw the blood dripping and he paid no attention to the increasingly loud screaming of the man. Moving in the heat of the excitement, Zeke turned and passionately kissed the man, who was trying as best he can to get away from Zeke. He wanted to tear away but he had been tied securely.

As Zeke kept the kissed locked in, he used the dagger to stab the man in the side. Non lethal, but a spot filled with pain receptors. He wanted to enjoy the few precious moments he had left. As the blood made contact with his hand, he felt something different than bloodthirst, something more akin to hunger, and it was uncontrollable. He could not refrain himself from what happened next. His hand pulled out the knife and he sliced the man's arm off at the shoulder. He heard the man scream but it seemed so far away as he then used his jaws to rip apart the man's neck, going for the jugular right away. Ripping and tearing at veins and arteries alike, Zeke could feel the feeble struggle of the man as wanted to fight Zeke off but it ended soon after.

He turned to the others and he could see that the two that were conscious were staring at him in horror. He didn't want to disappoint their darkest fears. The man who had the rag stuffed in his mouth seemed about ready to go so Zeke kindly pulled the rag out and kicked him in the chest to force him to spit out the blood. Then, Zeke stabbed him with his left hand, all five fingers pointed and where the heart should be. He didn't realize as he did so the runes on the left side of his body glowed brightly and when the hand made contact, it easily tore apart skin and flesh and shattered the ribcage protecting his heart. Zeke felt as if he was in a dream as he could feel the mans heart. He grabbed it and crushed it with all his might, and the man was no more. Withdrawing the hand from the man's chest, it still tightly held the heart. He stared intently at the heart for a moment, and then stuffed it into the man who lost his leg.

Zeke started laughing, he had never felt so happy before. He had brought justice to these people and it felt good. He wanted to do it again and again and again. He grabbed some cloth and bandaged the man's severed knee. The man looked in horror as Zeke did so, which ticked Zeke off. Zeke rammed a finger into each eye and pulled out the eyeballs and left it there for the rats to eat. Zeke then walked off, leaving the corpses and the two still living people in an abandoned building in the outskirts of town.

As he left, he roared into the wind, "I have just begun!"

A random trail of thought for today

2009-08-31T03:33:00.000-07:00

I had my back against the cavern walls, my eyes fixated at the entrance of the cavern, rifle at the ready. I was on first watch that night while my mates hung back deeper in to get some rest. The fire that we had kept alive to keep warm and serve as our only source of light was getting steadily dimmer and I saw the shadows of the night creep closer as if an animal sneaking up on it's prey.

As I sat there keeping watch, I heard someone coming up from the cavern. I shrugged it off as I knew it was about time for someone else to keep watch. We greeted each other and I turned around and headed into the cavern for some rest.

As I walked through the winding tunnels of the cavern and I finally reached my designated resting spot. The intricate design of the cavern only came into being after months of digging out places to keep safe from them and the bombs that were falling.

I set aside my rifle and laid down to rest.

I woke up several hours later to the sounds of my mates shouting something obscene. I went out into the main cavern and saw them gathered around a body on the floor. I rushed to their side and I saw that the body did not belong to one of us. I asked them where they had found the body and upon discovering the body was found not too far from the cavern entrance, I set off right away because I feared that whatever killed this person was close and could sneak in and cause untold havoc in here.

I rushed to my "room" grabbed my rifle and ran out. One of my mates followed suit and in no less than five minutes we were out of the cavern and into the lightly forested area outside. The two of us stealthily approached the area where the body was found. As our destination became closer and closer, the familiar smell of death began to fill the air.

Suddenly I heard the sound of lightning and a flash of light, I hit the floor and I glanced back to see if my mate had done the same. He was standing there rooted on the spot, clutching his chest, staring at me. He opened his mouth trying to say something but then another shot was fired and he was hit in the head, taken by death's cold embrace before he could speak a word.

I frantically looked around for the source of the bullets but I could make non out. I crawled to my mate's body and took his dogtags off. I then immediately stood up and too flight. I heard no shots being fired so I ran as fast as my feet could take me. As I sped along the forest, the cavern was beginning to be in my sight so I picked up my pace. Suddenly an arm came out from behind a tree and I was clothelined to the floor.

A man came from behind the tree, I recognized him as the man who replaced me during my watch kast night. His rifle hanging on his back. He stepped over me and put his knee on my chest. He looked into my eyes with disgust and pulled a knife out from his pocket. He stabbed me in the gut and then moved in close. "Die" he whispered into my ear as he pulled out the knife from my gut and proceeded to stab me over and over again.

I felt my life steadily flowing away from me as Death came to claim me, with my last few gasping breaths, I managed to see him stand up and aim his rifle to make sure I was dead. I died before he did his last dastardly deed .

Bored , No story, just crapping, might reexplore this story at a later date

Random Publications

2009-07-24T07:32:00.000-07:00

The limits of my emotional and mental capacity are fast approaching. The very ideals I hold dear are shattering apart. I find myself being able to enjoy mundane things now. The problems pile up like a mountain of flammable shit and for once, I didn't bring a flamethrower. When I look at it from an objective standpoint, It all seems so trivial it seems funny, but when viewed from the subjective standpoint that we all find ourselves 'blessed' with, it becomes a problem that is 'impossible' to overcome.

Now, it all seems fine and normal for a person to go through times like this, right? There's always someone to turn to and discuss your problems, right? Unfortunately, I do not trust people enough to discuss my problems in detail and would rather run into a brick wall, repeatedly, at full speed. Is my preference for bone shattering impacts with no positive outcome much more rewarding than sharing my problems and letting go of my emotions? Well, it seems that way. I'd rather have bones shattering than have something people can hold against me. The whole world revolves around the delicate card game that we call life where no one holds all the right cards but those who know when to play the wrong card are the true winners.

I am sure the last paragraph made no sense, I'm making it up along as I go. I am sure you are all waiting for a short piece by now yes? Of course, how silly of me.

A young man sits idly on the rooftop of a building, he lets out a sigh as he remembers the days he has just left behind. He grew up a social recluse during his 'formative years', not having much friends and avoided sports. He was a bright kid and though he was not 'popular' by any standards, he was content with life. Not throughoutly happy but satisfied. As this boy entered high school, he had decided he wanted to change, he took up sports and become slightly more social, slowly learning the ropes of being more social. He made lots of friends and though he believes he underachieved in his sport, he actually met all expectations and even exceeded some because he had never done sports prior.

With his new life involving sports and social activities, the boy turned teen began losing focus on his studies, but he never lost all focus and managed to score decent enough grades. This may all sound happy and dandy but the teen was not happy. He craved more but he did not know what exactly he craved, he had somehow developed a sense of ambition, to be the best but he never knew what he wanted to be the best at. He became obsessed with many things that he should not be obsessed with.

As his ambition grew, his social life grew steadily with it and before he knew it, he had managed to make more than his fair share of 'friends' that he trusted. He strived to keep his friends close and eventually slowly began to realize they were not his friends at all, they were merely there and were talked to, they were not there to help. Infact, he even noticed a trend that he was the one that was to help them all. He began taking back the misgiven trust that he placed on them but he never showed them that he was sick of it. There were few that still had his trust but those were truly few and far between. As he slowly took back the trust, he grew unnecessarily self aware and always postured himself, a shell that no one was to look through, he learnt to properly mask his true feelings by masking it from himself. He was just a coward hiding beneath well made characters. An endless charade began where he pretended he was unaware of what people truly perceived he was, or what he thought that they truly perceived him as.

This person had lost sight of who and what he was. He awaited something or someone to call him out of this shell of charades but he was lost, nobody was able to. Until...

End.

Not my best. Needs work, central theme is lacking.

Random Publications

2009-06-10T08:29:00.000-07:00

I sit here in my room, lights darkened and windows covered by curtains. My face illuminated with but the pale glow of the computer screen. My fingers dancing around the keyboard as if engaged in a ritualistic dance. Line after line of text begins to fill the screen as my fingers perform their tasks dutifully.

The dull humming of the computer mixed with the sounds made by the fan blend together to make a wonderful soundtrack as my ears are kept occupied by the sounds. I endlessly type and pour out my heart's most well kept secrets. I curse the fools who played my hand too early and stayed me from ultimate glory.

The fools I know bring only despair and misfortune to others, being far too arrogant in their actions to take pause and weigh their consequences. Their unfocused movements forced me off the tightrope of my life and I now hang precariously from the rope and pray that the preparations I have made prior to this day would suffice.

My fingers start to falter and my vision blurs. I know that I am not far from my end. Some editing here and there and my piece would be complete. My final act of retribution on men who deemed themselves much more than I. As I near completion of my last great scheme, my body gives out. And I fall off the chair.

The humming of the computer continues on as if in insult to me. Lying now empty on the table was an open bottle of tablets and a mug. The contents of the bottle were strewn about and the mug is empty.

The final piece of my grand scheme comes together as in my comatose state, I felt my last breath leave me.

- A rather odd piece.

My World, Your World #1

2009-04-30T23:38:00.000-07:00

It is with great pleasure that I speak of this topic today. I'm sure you are all wondering why I say my world and your world when obviously we all live on this same world. Nay, I am not taking time out of my busy life to write about mother earth, she has enough fans as it is.

The world I am talking about today is the world as seen by teenagers, where each of us are as if confined to our own little world surrounded by members of our collective clique where nothing you ever did was wrong, nobody would bother to take the time to look at you apart from your friends, and nobody wanted to lead you away from this madness.

Oh my, I seem to sound angsty, I apologize that is not at all my intention. That was merely a way to start things off. My life is a rather interesting one as you may see. I hope you may apologize as I may have dramatized it a bit.

Alright, let me begin from the years I was in pre-school. My pre-school life was a very odd time when we were first taught to use computers, we got into pitiful fights with each other over the silliest of things but that was the life back then. No divisions between the smarts the dumbs, the hots the nots. Of course, that was pre-school. If life stayed that simple there wouldn't be war.

Of course, pre-school won't last forever and before I knew it I was forced to primary. Jeez, I remember the first few months like it was yesterday. Clinging on to my mom's car even as it started moving, causing a fuss so that all the teachers would get pissed and all the stuff kids would love to do. Of course that couldn't go on forever and I stopped being such a little bastard after awhile. My teachers found a way to control me which I never found out what, but I do remember being an unnecesary dick in my early primary days. I even told teacher that doing their homework was boring because it wasn't challening. Oh if only I could say that about my homework these days. Haih.

In primary, especially as I got older, I was an unnecesarily angry kid. I guess my brain must have matured faster or I wasn't just able to control my emotions, but I almost committed suicide and attacked fellow students when I was younger. All of it was provoked of course , but looking back, if the things that provoked me then were to happen to me now, I wouldnt even take notice. My oh my, my youth was embarassing.

Of course, primary is never complete without monkey love. I did have people I was in to back in my youth but it never came to fruitation. Didn't have the balls then. Still don't have the balls today.

Damn, I seem to have drifted from the topic at hand, It is here during the primary school days that the rifts start forming, different groups all hanging together. Here however, I was still comfortable, because I grew up with many of them and I could count on them. I didn't have many friends back in those days but the one's I did have I cherish till today.

End part 1

post two,

2009-03-19T01:33:00.000-07:00

A man jogging early in the morning, his head lost in thought. His body was well toned and he had scars apparent on his exposed arms. His well kept hair also revealed that we may have been involved in either the armed forces or something of that equivalent.

"Every morning the same routine, wake up early, get some jogging done, do some gym work then off to work. Can't life be any more interesting?" he muttered to himself. Little did he know he would regret this words not much later.

I was finishing my normal jogging route when I saw some blood on the trail and signs of a struggle. I paused and began searching for whatever else I can. As I was looking through the dense bush, I saw something sparkle out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head to face it and I saw something that would shock most people, the body of a teenage boy floating in a ditch. Oh jeez, this is going to cause some unnecessary problems for me.

I took out my cell phone and called the cops. It didn't take them long for them to arrive and make a fuss out of things. The body was fished out of the ditch and they were checking him over when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around and saw a pretty experienced looking officer looking me straight in the eye. I could only manage a "May I be of assistance officer" before he motioned to his car. This was going to be a looong day.

Post One, Reentry to the writing world

2009-03-19T00:52:00.000-07:00

A man, roughly 5 feet 9 inches tall, slaving away at his computer. He had messy black hair and thick black rimmed glasses. He was wearing only his boxers and a bathrobe. He wasn't the most appealing person to the eyes but he wasn't a slob either. Weights and other exercise gadgets were strewn around the floor as if just after use. He suddenly paused and stared at the table.

The table is covered in memories. Moments in time too precious to throw, yet too painful to keep my eye's on them. I wiped away the lone tear that formed around my eye. I saved the file that contained my life story and headed to the kitchen to grab a mug of coffee. I lived in a very simple place. Apartment number 13 on the 13th floor of my condominium. It isn't too shabby but since most people think that the number 13 is extremely unlucky, I got the place for a bargain price. The apartment was divided into 4 rooms, A bathroom, a bedroom, kitchen and also my living room. Strangely though the biggest room is the bathroom, but at the very least it's something to talk about with people.

Well anyways when I got to the kitchen, everything seemed serene enough. I started boiling some water on the stove, grabbed my special mug and started mixing in the coffee mix. I loved my coffee a wee bit sweet so I added some condensed milk into the coffee. While waiting for the water to boil, I heard someone knock on my door. I opened the door and I saw my buddy Andrew collapse. He smelt of alcohol.

I thought to myself, I owe him enough to let him lie there for a bit. And that's where my trouble begins.

End Post 1.

Tagged lulz

2009-01-24T17:58:00.000-08:00

By both Lweez and Adam.

The Meme:
Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose six people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. Don’t forget to leave a comment (“You’re tagged!”), and to read your blog, you can’t tag a person who tagged you. Since you can’t tag me, let me know when you've posted your blog, so I can see your weirdness.

1. I obsess to much about rugby

2. I have a fluctuating ego, it goes high and it goes low all the time.

3. My faith in humanity is very low, hence I am easily joyed by other's accomplishments (bad experience in the past)

4. I am still recovering from a bad relationship way back in the past

5. I rarely share my sad feelings, my happy feelings however, I love to share

6. I enjoy when other's enjoy themselves.

7. Gaming used to be a bigger part of my life than it is today.
8. I have this obsession with making money, I have no real goal other than to make lots of money and sit on it.

9. My views on certain things are considered strange by some

10. I lack a sense of humour

11. I am rather indecisive and also tend to change my opinion on things alot

12. I believe myself to be open minded even though I may not be

13. I believe people have more faith in me than they should

14. I am a major nerd

15. I used to post on forums alot, now I keep forgetting to (see: getting older)

16. My mind wanders from thinking everyone is a total idiot or geniuses, it's negative and positive that way

Tagging:
Nadia
Azzief
Rezal
Aunty Najwa :P
Naomi
And hanaan x)

My Dream Their Reality

2009-01-24T07:08:00.000-08:00

I sit there, merely giving them the briefests of acknowledgements as they speak their own language. Not once do I say that I do not understand them, that I do not understand their sharp words that are aimed at me. I merely allow them their fun, for what is life without fun. I smile and pay for my food and I am off, excusing myself with sweet words to allow them to enjoy themselves in their merrymaking.

I arrive at my place, sit back and think. For that is all I have left to myself these days and nights. For better or for worse I have come to a place where many roads lie before me and I have willingly chosen the one with more peril but promises most gain. Every step I take brings me ever closer to the limits of my sanity, my saving grace lies no more within the material world for that is I, one who holds nothing dear any longer.

Many a day I have come to my study where I have no more left in me to smile, and those around me show their concern. Though my heart knows their concern is true my mind corrupts it as trust becomes rarer and rarer to place. Never before have I faltered in placing my trust but as it is, I may soon loose faith in more things than was ever thought possible.

Many times I have opted to go seperate ways when I was in the company of the people I know. They see me sit down and write, and though in reality I just needed to escape from the confines of their norm, I bait them to believe I am busy as not to hurt their feelings. I feel myself losing my grip on myself, as if I no longer even know who I am.

These problems tear at my very being day in and day out but I keep hoping to myself I'd cure myself of this sad state of depression. May those who it may concern in these blog never figure out it is they that I speak of.

Workout.

2008-10-23T06:46:00.000-07:00

Superset
10x Hindu Pushups
20x Regular Squats
10x Crunches
10x Leg Raises

2 sets.

10x Regular Pushups
10x Heel Raises per leg.
10x Supermans
20s Plank

I'm on the road back to fitness, These occasional posts will keep myself motivated. As it is I am VERY unfit

2008-08-14T00:06:00.000-07:00

The night was silent. The sounds of animals and insects strangely silenced. A group of hunters numbering 6 was stealthily treading the dangerous terrain in search of food for their village. There was a strange unexplainable phenomena happening in the village where food would not grow and where water began pooling one day the next that very same spot was as barren as the desert.

The hunters suddenly heard a roar that sounded as if it came from the bowel's of hell. All the hunters dropped to their knees in fear for as long as the roar lasted. After taking a moment to steel their hearts they began getting up, they were afraid, confused and perhaps, doomed yet they still continued moving around the plains into a forested area. They had no choice for if they did not bring back food that night their people would starve. When they reached the forested area, their luck seemed to turn good as they found an abundance of animals such as deer. They took their time to down the deer and other animals before tying them up and headed home.

On the return trip the hunters felt a sudden unease in their hearts as they suddenly remembered the roar. They didn't know where it came from or even what it was. Fearing for their village now, they rushed back as fast as they could with the food in tow. When they arrived at the village, they could not believe their eyes. The village looked as if it was attacked by an entire army. The guards laid dead at their posts, their body minced into pieces, the men of the village lay dead in front of the chapel. A lone hunter went inside the chapel to see if his worse fears were true. As he stepped inside the chapel, his worst fears were confirmed as he saw the bodies of the women and children carelessly tossed around. He walked around checking if any were alive. Suddenly, he heard the wailing of a single child coming from near the stand. He ran to the stand and found the child covered in white silk untouched by the carnage.

The hunter brought the child out of the chapel to meet with the other hunters. The hunters were slowly coming out each building, their faces filled with despair. They slowly began noting the damages. The buildings were mostly unscathed save those that had people thrown into them. Whatever it was clearly came just to kill them. They decided that it was not safe here and they made their way to the city. They vowed they would avenge their town. As for the child, it was named Gabriel. And this is his story.

End part one.
Author's notes
Didn't want it to be a two or three parter. it just happened, tbc.

short for july

2008-07-13T07:21:00.000-07:00

The streets alive with a festival. Dancers displaying their grace and athleticism, musicians playing tunes both familiar and not so. There were also many minor games such as archery and wresting being held. The atmosphere of the festival is that of merry making. The streets filled with many stalls selling many trinkets and rarely found items. There was also a pub area close to the center of the street where people would gather together to drink and be merry. The pub area also had a very thick air of smoke about from all sorts of thinks people smoke from pipes to drugs.

In the back alleys of the streets, muscled men rush around carrying all sorts of barrels from those with food to the prizes for the games. They hurriedly but carefully open the storage boxes from which they then distribute the goods among the merchants. They are the ones who dispose of the trash the merrymakers leave and they are also the one stealthily keeping the peace. After the initial buzz these men slowly ease up and relax

The day slowly turns to night and the merry making begins to slow down. The back alley army awakens and starts clearing the mess that was left behind. With speed and unparalleled precision they cleared up the mess. The morning the day after the carnival, the carnival area was empty, no trash, no beer, no nothing that could indicate yesterday's festivities could be found. Most people who pass by wonder what happen to the mess but only the few who worked closely with the festival official knew who were the ones so capable of doing suck a feat overnight.

Without recognition or fame, just their monthly pay. The men gather their things and head for their next job.

Short for July. Not very good

Short.

2008-06-22T06:47:00.000-07:00

An eerie silence fills the savannah. The wild cheering and hooting of the wild tribes are nowhere to be heard. Missing too are the sounds of the animals. The land where many deemed unconquerable seemed subdued at this precious moment in time. Time seemed to inch very slowly in this place.

A man, who was lying still on the ground, slowly got up and began looking around. He was not at all disturbed by the strange scene that was before him. He had spent nights upon nights here and never did he find any other living thing save the trees. He also never grew tired nor did he need to feed or drink. It was something that this man had grown used to. His every moment was filled with immense loneliness. He sighed as he saw no one else had come.

The man resignedly sat on a rock and closed his eyes. Suddenly he felt the touch of warm gentle arms around him. He turned around and saw her. He began tearing and held her close. She smiled at him as he fixed her eyes upon her. They then held their gazes on each other before they just turned to the west and walked off.

A blaze, its fire’s dancing seductively reaching out to the skies. Men and women dancing feverishly around the fire. Sacrifices and gifts lay around the blaze. The wife of the former chief lay close to death in a grave beside her husband’s old grave. As the wife of the former chief drew her last breath, the dancing reached suddenly reached new heights of fervor then abruptly stopped. Mourning began and the body was buried. The sacrifices and gifts were buried around the graves. Then the wife’s body was lit ablaze as her husband’s before her before finally being buried.

The man and woman from before dancing happily in their eerie world, glad after being reunited after so long.

Mothers Dedication

2008-05-10T08:41:00.000-07:00

A dedication to all mothers

First of before I begin my tale. I'd like to wish my mother Happy Mothers Day. She has been an inspiration to my life since primary school. She always inspired me to do better and always made me look at myself critically and analyze myself so that I would be able to know my own faults and always keep a level head and make the right decisions. She is also the reason I have become a better person this day and a better person every day after. My mother is also the source where I get my ability in language and she is where I turn to when in need of help in my studies. I strive this day to better heights thanks to my mother. Thank you mom, and have a very happy mother's day.

And to my other mother, Nadia, who despite being only the same age as me has shown maturity beyond her years and manages to be an excellent mother figure to me. She has always been there to stop me from doing many stupid things that could have led me down a really bad path. She has also become sort of my moral support always there to give encouragement to do good and study and all that stuff. Though I struggle to find the words to describe my gratitude, I would like to offer my most sincere thanks for always being there when I needed you, whether you know I needed you or not.

And with that I begin my short story.

A child playing in the park with his friends, he fell down and got cuts all over his knees. He started to tear up but he put up a brave front. He got up and walked to the side and sulked while the other children played. Not missing a beat his mother came up to him and nursed his wounds. He was a little embarrassed by it so he turned his face away and pretended not to care. His mother didn't care as she diligently nursed his wound with a caring look on her face.

A teenager comes home from school and dirties the floor. His mother cleans it up and tells him not to dirty the floor next time. The teenager only shrugs and goes into his room. His mother tells him to study but he ignores her and keeps using the computer and surfs the net. She is angry that he does not study but she keeps calm and never shows that she is angry.

A man wants to get married but his mother doesn't like the bride he has chosen. Although she isn't happy. She only wishes for her son to be happy so she gives them her blessing to get married. After the marriage her son ignores her and lives happily with his wife and rarely visiting. His mother doesn't mind and she is even glad that her son is happy.

A funeral and the mother is no more. Her son cries and weeps at her funeral. He knew he should have shown her more appreciation. From the time he hurt himself up to his marriage with the girl he knew she clearly despised. But alas it is too late for that. He is forever left with a feeling of regret for never showing her any appreciation.

I wouldn't like to be like that man. Please, show our Mothers, our own personal angels, that we care and we appreciate them for all the effort. Thank You

One for April

2008-04-01T07:27:00.000-07:00

Just a placeholder. One for every month as they say

The Decision Cast Arc 2

2008-03-15T02:29:00.000-07:00

My soul drifted in my hell. My mind concentrated to fend off the pain I was being subjected to. I had long lost the ability to distinguish what was happening around me save the torture being inflicted. Suddenly, I felt the pain the torture was inflicting become less and less, as if they were finally letting up. The room began lightening up, slowly, as if to allow my eyes to adjust to the light. I felt myself slowly floating downwards and for the first time in ages I felt the floor. As I my feet touched the floor.. I immediately fell forward, They were in pain and not accustomed to my weight after so long without use.

As I was there,laying on the floor in helplessness, the men in white from before opened the door and came in to clean my wounds. My mind was filled with questions, why? who? how long has it been?, But as I was about to open my mouth to ask, one of the men spoke and told me to be patient and all the details will come with time. I was lifted of the floor and put on a stretcher and carried out of the room to an infirmary. I had no idea what was going to happen to me but all I could do was wait.

As I was lying in the infirmary bed I pondered to what could have been the reason behind my release. Not much later there was a man with a noble face and strongly built frame and dressed in black garbs, totally contrasting the people around him who were dressed in white, walked into the room. He looked very important so I tried to stand to bow but he said in an intimidating voice to stay on the bed. He motioned to his attendees for a chair and soon he was seated in front of me.

Give or take five minutes later, he began talking. He said "You're probably wondering why you are here and not suffering. Well the answer is that you're of need elsewhere, back in the world where you came from. A battle will erupt there which will shape the galaxy and you shall have to join the rest of those we have released to gather the living and lead them in the battle. This will be your first step to redemption. We shall speak more soon."

With that the man and his entourage left the room. I was left there thinking how this would resemble a scene straight out of a fantasy movie back home, but hey, it was a chance.

Authors Notes :
Blogger screwed up on me, Formatting dead and crap, also stupid cliche'd story but hey, I want to include fighting. :)

Valentines.

2008-02-14T00:00:00.000-08:00

Diary Entry, Feb 14th.

I lay awake on my bed, unable to sleep because of excitement. I was excited because today was the 14th of February, or better known as valentines day to people, and that today was the day I finally decided to confess to the girl of my dreams. She was beautiful I tell ya, shoulder length hair, beautiful black eyes that seemed to peer into your soul and the most.. well for lack of better words, AWESOME smile I have ever seen. And she wasn't just beautiful she had an awesome personality, she was friendly, encouraging, smart, athletic, and so much more! I was excited and nervous but I had it all planned, wake up early and head off to school with flowers, chocolate and the card I had made myself. I nearly kicked myself the other day when I decided to make the card, it would have seemed so totally lame but I was going to lay it all on the line. It was do or die now.

I arrived at school much earlier than usual and made for her table. She was in the class next door you see but I'd never have the guts to talk to her whenever we passed each other in the hall. I mean hey! It's not like you can just casually to the one you're having a crush on right? Anyways I sneaked into class with the help with the school guard, great guy he is, and put the stuff on her table and then made my way to my class for a nap. I guess the adrenaline you get from excitement really does disappear right after you finally get it done eh? or maybe it was the lack of sleep but same difference. Haha

Well anyways let me see, we'll skip past the me waking up and all the classes for now eh? It was boooooring. Anyways now it's lunch break and I was just sitting around near the canteen and then I saw her walking to the canteen hand in hand with another guy. Man that sucked but hey I guess I should have moved faster right? I was reaaally depressed about that so I just went back to class and spent the rest of the day in a daze walking around. When the last bell sounded I quickly made my way out of the school. Just as I was about to leave school though I heard her call out my name from behind.

I turned around and saw her running at me with the guy from before being dragged along. I was about to panic and run away but she managed to grab me in time. She then said how she loved the stuff I gave her and said she'd love to be my valentine and that she was looking for me during our lunch break. Of course my heart leapt for joy but I asked her who was this guy she was holding hands with. She gave a chuckle and explained that it was her older brother and that they she was real affectionate with him. Man I nearly burst out laughing right there, getting all depressed over nothing.

Well let's skip ahead abit, next thing I know we were saying goodbye to her brother and were walking hand in hand to the mall. We had a blast there and such but the most wicked part was that all my shyness from before apparently evaporated. I guess her personality made it real easy for me to talk and stuff. Well we hanged at the mall till her parents called her and told her to go home. I then walked her home, (man it was far but man was it worth it) when we arrived at her doorstep she kissed me goodbye, giggled and went in. I just stood there shocked. My first kiss with the girl of my dreams. This day was definitely going my way. Anyways I got home, my parents weren't home yet so I grabbed some crackers and here I am writing this.

Oh man I gotta run, my parents just called me and told me to go to the restaurant nearby. I'll write more later. x)

Mood : Hyperly Happy!

February 16th News Report.

A boy was found lying dead in a ditch yesterday, his stuff all taken away save for his ID, an apparent victim of a vicious mugger. He was found early yesterday morning by joggers who were going about their morning jog. His parents have been contacted and they claimed the body earlier today. The victim had bruises on his arms and chest indicating that the victim put up a struggle. Police speculated that the mugger panicked and used a sharp object on the victim causing a deep cut on his head which may have resulted in the fatal blow. No comment could be consented by the parents however reports show that the mother laments on how they shouldn't have let him go to a local restaurant and how he should have eaten in instead.

A funeral will be held on the 17th at the mayfair street cemetary. All friends and family are requested to attend and pay their last respects.

Authors Note

Meh. I should be confessing my love to someone but I've got no guts for it. Also the last part of the story is still lacking. I apologize for that

10.15.6.1.8

2008-01-05T11:21:00.000-08:00

I remember that day so well, It was almost perfect, the sun shining brightly, bathing the forest chapel in a golden light that radiated warmth and comfort. The flowers were in full bloom and the animals were scurrying by as if they had not a care in the world. I stood at the altar with a smile plastered on my face as I took in the view. As I was looking around my best man tapped my shoulder lightly and told me that the bride was here. I turned around and saw the woman of my dreams, with her long beautiful black hair tied and hidden under her wedding veil, her lovely blue eyes enchanting me as I looked into her eyes her lovely rose red lips seductively smiling at me. My heart leaped wit joy as I watched her take her fathers arm right before they began walking down the aisle, with my lovely bride to be moving in such a graceful manner. As she arrived to where I was standing, I began to feel a bit of nervousness as she let go of her father's arm and took mine as we stood in front of the priest that was to wed us.

I held her hand the priest before us began recited our vows to us, my hands slowly began to tremble as I had never been so nervous in my life, Not everyone gets to be married to the woman of their dreams on such a beautiful day. Just when I thought I couldn't take it anymore I felt her tighten her grip on my hand and her warm touch was all I needed to calm down.

It was not meant to be sadly. For when the priest finished reciting our vows and we said our I do's and we were about to lock lips, I suddenly felt an unearthly grip forcibly pull me away from her. I was flung into a tree and I heard a sickening crack as flesh met wood. I attempted to look up and saw that the wedding reception was being attacked by strange beasts and my wife was surrounded by them crying out my name, yelling for me to get up. I struggled to get up despite the pain but could only barely grab a fallen branch to attack the beasts. I managed to get their attention for just long enough for my friends to get my wife away despite her protests. I motioned for her to run as I held the branch at a ready stance as I waited them to attack.

They slowly began to surround me, I knew that it would have been wise to run but I knew my injuries would have at the very least slowed me down a lot. I had no other choice but to stay and fight. I slowly tried to move into a more defensive place but alas there was no time, The very moment I took a step back a beast charged me from behind and I was tackled to the floor. I tried to wrestle it off me but the injury from before kept me from using any real strength against it. I saw the other beasts begin to charge in and as I was about to resign myself to my fate and let them finish me, a shining light came rushing in from the shadows and the beasts started to cower in fear, instantly I felt a surge of relief and I took this as a sign from above for me to try and get the hell out of there. With a shout I pushed the beast that was on me off and made a run for where the light came from as the beasts were in cowering in fear from the light. I felt my body resist my will to run and suddenly I found myself on the floor.

But that did not deter my spirits and I stood back up and limped till my wounds caught up with me and I fell face flat on the forest floor. I felt a sense of helplessness but couldn't help but laugh as I lay there bleeding and wounded on the verge of death. Suddenly I heard the rustling of leaves. I thought the beasts had finally snapped out of their stupor and decided to finish me off. Instead of beasts I saw a man who had beautiful blue eyes that looked wizened with age and long neat hair contrasting greatly with how old he looked and he was clothed in beautiful silver robes. He approached me and he crouched beside me and looked at me as if he knew of my ordeal, a look of pity mixed with delight.

He open his mouth and began to speak. I could not recall what exactly he said but I know he had given me a chance to start my life anew, with the condition that nobody can find out about who I was before or I would suffer the consequences.. Or that I could choose to die here and he would make sure my soul would find peace. I chose the former as although I could not tell anyone who I was I still wish to protect my wife, whom I do not know how she would react to my "death"

As soon as he heard my decision he smiled.. Then he began to laugh, as he did so I felt myself losing my grip on reality and the next thing I knew I was adrift in darkness. This darkness was soothed my soul and did not give off a menacing feel as it does most times. As I floated around this darkness in a calmness I have never felt, I saw a sudden ray of light surround me and ripped me from this darkness. As I awoke, I found myself laying on the floor outside of the village where my wife and I grew up. I walked to the nearby lake to take a drink and saw myself in the water, I looked totally different. My face no longer had any traces of my youthful smile nor my light hazel eyes, not even a strand of my long blond hair remained. I now looked like a middle aged man who had seen his share of troubles with short black hair and haunting dark black eyes. I noted also that my body was now much more toned, as though I was a mercenary.

I entered town as it was a time of mourning and everyone would be gathered at the church. I then felt a sudden pang of hunger so I decided to walk around to see if any food was lying around, as I was wandering around the town I tripped on a tree root's and fell to the floor and got knocked unconscious . When I regained consciousness I was on a bed inside a room with clothes by my bedside and food on the table. I hastily made for the food because I could still feel my stomach roaring for something to nourish it. As I began to wolf down my food I noticed somebody walking in. I turned to see who it is and I was shocked to say the least, to see it was the old man from before.

He looked at me with mischief in his eye and began telling me what I needed to know. First he told me that he was some sort of god in his own right and that he was most concerned with directly influencing lives. He also said that the beasts attacking my wedding was an event caused by a distortion in space. All too technical for my tastes but I listened anyways. As he finished explaining things he finally added that he just moved to my town recently and that he always saw me and my lover enjoying ourselves and that was the reason he offered me a choice to have a second shot at life anyways. I did not understand why he couldn't just heal me and let me live normally and get married though but I did not push it as I had too much to process already.

End Part One
Kinda got too long so I'll stop here for now. =/

Year. (For lack of a better Title)

2007-12-30T10:24:00.000-08:00

I had reached the age that most would consider the end of my existence. I had known this moment was to come with the movement with the stars. It is fated that my life will end on this very day. I began my rounds on this fine day with no less enthusiasm than normal, for I disbelieve in the need to carry myself different even if I were doomed to death.

I had my usual aura about myself and tried to pass through the day without letting too many realize that this is the end for me. I was unable to have such an ideal day though for as soon as I began my rounds I found many notes and letters for me bidding me farewell and how they would never forget me and what I have done for them. This simple show of acknowledgement and appreciation for the things I have done left me with a warm feeling in my heart. I knew I would have no regrets moving on.

As the day began to get darker and the end of my rounds drew close, I noted the familiar sound of a baby crying. I knew my time was nigh and I took the child with me and carried him till I arrived at the last place I had to go for my rounds. I looked into the eyes of the child and saw that he was like me, doomed to lead this life and yet blessed that he would be that which moves the world.

As the clock neared 12 I heard people bidding their farewells to me and welcoming this child. I removed my necklace and placed it around the child. I noticed that I was slowly disappearing so I quickly wrote a note for this child and hid it within the necklace. As the clock struck 12 and the clocks began their dull chiming I felt myself being removed from this place.

Now I am just another year in history I guess.

Authors Note

Well this is my take on the story of Father Time passing the torch onto Baby Near Year. There's a few morals included but =3.

The Decision Cast

2007-12-27T19:41:00.000-08:00

My knee's felt week as I had my judgement. It was like hearing something that was totally unbelievable. I felt as if there was finally something good happening in this place of waiting. A few men dressed in all white approached and escorted me out of the hall and lead me up the stairs to where my judgement will be manifested.

I was taken to a room where I was to abide for the rest of eternity, and in this room it seemed it's size was limitless and everything inside it was changed by merely the power of thought. I looked at the men in white and I suddenly gained the knowledge that this was merely your personal abode in this Eden.

Arc 1

They signaled for me to follow them out the door. I followed without hesitation and I was lead to a place where many people were, they were dressed in plain simple garments and they were enjoying themselves in a place that even felt as if it was gently humming a tune that seemed to constantly lift my spirits. I know now that this is what they mean by Eternal Bliss.

I turned around and looked at the men in white. One of them walked out and began to speak.
"This is but a level in bliss for you shall not be satisfied with mere entertainment, once you have bored of this place you may seek us once more and we shall lead you to where you may begin your climb to true bliss and you will find what it means to feel perfect." he said. With that he went back to the group and they swiftly moved out of sight.

This arc is just an open ended one in case I feel like reviving this or people ask me to. The arc i prefer is the one is Arc 2 which begins now.

Arc 2

The men in white began leaving the room. I payed no heed to them but as soon as they left the room began changing. The way out of the room suddenly shut tight and the walls lost it's individual traits. The room became a place where you couldn't tell which way is which. Even worse the room became dark and the gravity in the room suddenly disappeared.

I found myself floating in disorientation in a dark room, I felt the need to scream but no sound came from my throat. I tried to go for a wall and break it down but I realized that there were no walls that could be reached for they will keep going just out of reach leaving me with hope which is quickly utterly destroyed. Yet I kept persevering.

I heard the wall's shift a bit and spikes shot out of the walls impaling me. They quickly disappeared and left me bleeding. The sudden attack had me screaming in pain trying to cover the wounds. As soon as the pain began to recede the wounds disappeared and a spike impaled me. I could not die nor could I faint. The tortures would always get worse but I knew this hell is what awaited me for what I have done in life and this is how I shall wait and suffer till I may be granted Eternal Bliss for my life was judged and it was deserved that I would be tormented till repentance.

For now it may seem like a far off dream but in my heart the hope for Eternal Bliss shall never leave and I shall persevere in this hell of mine.

Maybe will continue this depending on how the reaction to it is. Either arc's would work.

Untitled

2007-12-26T08:00:00.000-08:00

The last thing I remember was the cold embrace of death as I was murdered in the name of personal gain. It feels as if my soul is chained to this place as I was forcefully ripped out of my body as he killed me. I was being made to see myself fall down dead and him leaving the area as he began to flee. I began to follow but the chains did not allow me to and my sight was taken away from me. I felt as if I was thrown across a room and onto a hard surface.

My eyes could suddenly see again and I found myself in a place filled with darkness with only the light at the end of the tunnel. I knew there was no place for me in the light as my life on earth brought no good but I still hurried for it. As I ran after it, it began to narrow and I felt a sudden jerk on my leg and I was tripped. As I fell to the floor I saw the path to the light closed and the wall that closed it off had faces of the people I have killed trying to get out and take me to their hell.

I realized that I never did fall to the floor and that I kept on falling and what I saw as I kept falling kept becoming worse and worse till no mortal mind could stand it and might shut off. Unfortunately I am not able to reach the bliss that is being unconscious. My fall began to falter and chains began wrapping themselves around my arms and feet.

As the chain tightened and my limbs started bleeding I finally stopped and found myself staring face to face with the result of my life. It was a man whose face was never the same and kept changing, whose body although was solid looked as if it was unreal and merely looking at it chilled to the bone.

He spoke and I knew what awaits me is to begin. The tools that I will be well acquainted with soon appeared me and trapped me in a cell that is my personal hell, the faces of those I wronged shouting and wailing lined the walls. The man grabbed his tools and begun his torture and I did nothing to resist for this fate I have chosen and this hell my own.

And because this hell is a step for my redemption in the eyes of those around me in this cage, Where I remain bound by the chains of life and tortured by that which I created.

End Note
Well It's not very good, It didn't have any written plan it just became that way as I typed.

The Decision Cast

2007-12-25T08:44:00.000-08:00

We were gathered to the Hall of Eden for an announcement that would determine if you're lives within Eden would be forever bliss or torment till repentance. The moment where our lives are judged and the virtue weighed against the sins of the man. I enter the Hall drawn by the chance at grasping at the knowledge that my life would have been on a level which would banish the thought of torment forever.

The assembled began trudging along towards the stand where they would read out the story of your life for which they will divulge every detail for we are the ones who have met our end and now only await judgement and time bears no meaning to our being. As the speakers end their story of each man they bring down judgement. And for all that we see for every man sent to eternal bliss where he would have no worries, ten more would be sent to torment.

I stood awaiting my turn and as the speaker finally said my name and prepared to bring down judgement I listened to every word as if they are the only things ever worth knowing. The story of my life is such that even the assembled in the Hall of Eden are left awed. As they finished the tale I was handed my judgement.

Retarded First Post

2007-12-17T07:58:00.000-08:00

The relaxing breeze as I lay there in the grass watching the stars. I close my eyes and recall the days events. The children laughing and running around in the park, the parents panicking as they think their children might get hurt. What an ideal world.

The breeze started to feel moist and I could taste water in my mouth. I lay there ignoring it when the rain drops fell, dropping from the heavens in a sporadic motion almost as if it was playing a symphony of music.

These things intrigue me. I got up and carried the body of a child and laid it to rest beside the others. It is a most troubling time.

Placeholder

2007-12-17T07:47:00.000-08:00

My mind is a blank that refuses to fill and thus i shall leave this placeholder for when my brain works.